2022 May Manuscript (and new dog) Update

I haven’t finished it yet. I’d rather write it well than write it faster. And I’m learning more and more about what matters to me as I write it. Every hitch in the manuscript causes me to pause and reflect on what I want to say. What and whose story am I really trying to tell.

It isn’t so much about the plot anymore. It’s about who these people are. What is it about their characters that determines how they react to what happens in the story. Since I write about trauma, I have to set the right tone. Humorous but with dignity and respect.

I might be writing a romance, but I think my characters are bigger and more human than the romance novel tropes that would box them in. I hope they are more dimensional. There might not be space in the novel to develop secondary characters fully. I’m sure I’ll make mistakes, and the finished product won’t be perfect.

But if the reader is interested enough in the characters, if they’re hooked on the story, and emotionally invested, the imperfections won’t matter that much. As long as the characters and their story are authentic, and I tell the right story, it should be fine, I hope. LOL.

I was really arrogant when I was growing up. I used to think I would be a great writer. Now, I just want to be a good one. And finish this novel sometime soon. This year would be nice.

Though I have been distracted with video games, namely Lost Ark… when my head is a mess and it’s too hard to write and my parents are getting on my nerves, that’s my go-to outlet and escape.

Also, we got another dog. A Yorkie-Mini Schnauzer mix. It was my parents’ idea. My aunt found a stray dog under her car and took the dog home instead of taking the dog to the shelter or something. She offered the dog to my parents, who agreed to take him in. I told my mom it’d be too hard to train another dog. I should have held my ground, but he looked cute in the picture and my parents had already committed. I DID NOT ASK FOR ANOTHER DOG.

But I was also kind of sad because my real dog didn’t sleep in my room anymore but in my mom’s room with the other chihuahua. So, my parents wanted to give the dog to me. Which was really a poor decision because I don’t know how to train a dog. They always complain about how I can’t take care of my pets. We didn’t even know if the dogs would get along.

When they brought the dog home and I saw how active he was, I knew I wouldn’t be able to take care of him properly. First, it is tiring and stressful. Second, I don’t have the patience and time to train a dog, and it is tiring and stressful. Third, DO THEY EVEN KNOW ME? DO THEY SEE ME? Shouldn’t they know that I can’t take care of a dog?

I told my psychiatrist, how could they expect me to take care of and train a new dog who is very active and runs all around the garden and digs up stuff in the garden, which pisses off my parents tremendously, when I can barely take care of myself? I AM DISABLED FOR FUCK’S SAKE.

OMG, I was so pissed and frustrated and stressed out. I was also very resentful of my parents for forcing me to take the dog. Sometimes, I get so stressed and feel so helpless and powerless and depressed I can’t stop crying. And sometimes my anxiety is so bad I can’t relax for days. It’s like forcing someone to have a kid they don’t want and don’t have the skills and will to take care of.

But the dog was so pitiful and wants to be loved because he was living on the fucking streets. He was skinny and malnourished and even had worms. That’s right. TAPEWORMS. Sigh. It’s too funny sometimes. I mean, of all the weirdest things that could happen to me.

I just want to know WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY PARENTS. They probably mean well. They think a dog will be good for me. But what I really want is to not be chronically in pain. And sometimes, I can’t wait until this is all over. Finish my book and write and publish a few more and leave something behind before I go.

And that’s pretty much it. Say what I need to say about what I have learned about and wish for in life. When I need a break, I play video games. You know, I thought I was going to be lonely when I quit WoW. But man, I’m so busy with writing and all the little but huge dramas at home.

I’ll be fifty in a couple of years. I can’t imagine living another 30 years like this. The pain will most likely get worse, my eyesight has gotten worse in the past five years too. Maybe things will change after I get published. Who knows how big my book will be.

But I have a mental illness, and I don’t trust my judgment sometimes. And that’s why I try harder to get it right, no matter how long it takes.

May the New Year 2022 give us a break and be my breakout year.

I figured it’s time for an update.

How’s the writing coming along? You ask.

Not too bad, thanks. I’m 23,000 words into this current draft. I’m aiming for 70,000-80,000, standard novel length. There’s still a lot of story tell, so the novel might end up closer to 90,000 words. Although, I’d rather finish it sooner than later. It’s exhausting. For instance, with Chapter 9, I was up until 4 AM writing a scene because I needed to know how it would end. I went to sleep. When I woke up, three or four hours later LOL, I read what I had written and knew I’d need to revise or trash almost everything. But having written the scene, I knew now how I wanted it to end. The next two days, I polished it up, and I gotta say, it turned out pretty well. Things are starting to flow, plot threads are weaving, so many threads to keep track off. The best way to write a novel IMO is to start with the end, know where you’re going.

When do you think you will finish your novel?

If the writing continues to go well, as I believe it will, I should have a completed draft by May. I’ve written a synopsis (it’s great!), and I finally have a working title. Maybe, revisions, checking for continuity issues, but I think when I’m done it’ll be as close to a final as I can get. I’m revising as I go along because I can’t stand when a scene feels unfinished. Even though I have somewhat of an outline, the plot points have changed over time. It’s fun though seeing the world I’m building. It’s like I’m living in my own book. LOL. I’m writing the book I want to read. There will be an audience for it. At least, one person will read it hahaha. There’s always self-publishing.

Do you have a marketing plan?

Somewhat. I think about how to market my book to motivate me to keep on writing. I’ve been blogging, reviewing, and promoting trad, indie, and self-published romance since 2012. So, I have some contacts in the romance publishing industry. I’m on mailing lists, and authors have emailed me directly offering me advanced review copies to help promote their books. Maybe one or more of them will do the same for me.

Anything else you want to say to your followers?

Even if the writing is trash, there’s something in it, something in you, that prompted you to write it. Figure out what you were trying to say, what you needed to say, and then revise it. Frame in a way that’s consistent with your narrative voice and your characters’ motivations. Sometimes what you want for your characters aren’t what they want for themselves. Always circle back to the heart of the story. And even if you have bad days, if you’re feeling depressed, tired, alone, don’t get down on yourself. Don’t force yourself to write. I know it sucks, especially with Covid raging on; sometimes it feels more than ever that our days our numbered. But in the big picture, when your time has passed, you’re not gonna care if your books are on the NY Times bestseller list. I write because it’s a way to pass the time while I’m disabled, it’s been my dream since I can remember, and I think the harder I try, the more I practice, the better I’ll get at it. I’d be sad if I don’t finish this book, but I don’t see that happening. This book is getting done in probably 4 months at the earliest. I’m on a roll now. And I’m thinking, maybe, this is my year. The books is probably going to be controversial. But who cares. I love it. So, believe in yourself, don’t give up, and be kind. Because kindness is even harder to accomplish than writing a book.

Reflections on 2021?

The best thing I ever did in 2021 was quit playing World of Warcraft to write a romance novel. I want to be optimistic about my writing, but I’m kind of superstitious. I have anxiety, which can really fck with your head sometimes. And I’m afraid of being let down. I’ve had many rejections in the past. Things could be worse, but things can also get a lot better too. Most of all, I just want to stay healthy.

Anne Rice (1941-2021)

When I woke up this morning, I found out from the notification from The NY Times on my iPhone Lock Screen that one of my writing inspirations has passed away.

This paperback of Interview With the Vampire (1986) got me through some rough times when I was living in London. Those times when I was fighting with my parents, this is the book I would escape to. I had such a hard time parting with this book that I couldn’t stand to let any of my friends borrow it.

As you can see, I’ve read this book many, many times over the years. I will never forget when I met the author at a book signing at the Earthling in Santa Barbara for the release of Tale of the Body Thief. And whenever I drove on Divisadero St in San Francisco, I would think about a boy interviewing a vampire named Louis.

Interview With the Vampire will always be one of my all-time favorite books. The imagery in the opening paragraph is perfect, delivered with a crisp, direct brevity not many writers can mimic or achieve. The Witching Hour was my third favorite book of hers, after The Vampire Lestat.

When I was 14 and 15, I would imagine Lestat flying to my window just as he had once visited David Talbot of the Talasmasca in London. I would imagine that Lestat had come to take me away from my troubles. I would imagine Lestat freeing me, and flying away with him in the starry sky.

Out of all the MFA programs I’d been accepted to, San Francisco State was my first choice because I knew Anne Rice had gone there.

RIP Vampire Queen

Don’t read this, it’s garbage

My writing sucks. I keep getting stuck. I don’t know why. I keep thinking, maybe, I’ve reached my limit. Being disabled, I have to recognize my limitations. And maybe, this is it. Maybe, I’ll never be able to write a novel. Maybe, I put too much pressure on myself to write a good one. Realistically, I’m good, but not that good. Not good enough to get published. I don’t know why I’m so obsessed about writing a good book. I just have to write one. Then, I can fix it. But I’ll write for a week or two. I’ll have all this energy, and while I’m writing, I’m thinking this is some good shit. I feel kinda high and excited. Then, a week later, I look at what I wrote and think, WTF is this. Sigh. I don’t know if it’s a Bipolar thing. If I was a little manic for that week or two, then I came down from the high, and now, I don’t have that energy anymore. My project feels overwhelming again. I can’t think clearly, and I’m feeling depressed and thinking I’ll never make it as a writer. Then, I feel like crying, and maybe I cry a little, because the thought of never finishing any of the books I’ve started writing and never getting published is so freaking depressing. I want my life to mean something. I want to do something with my life. I wanted to make a living as a writer. That was my dream my whole life. Pretty much ever since about third grade when I first read Jane Eyre and didn’t even understand all the big words and didn’t know at the time that was the book that would inspire me to be a writer. That dream of writing books for all the world to read was what kept me going through all my struggles in life. When I was hospitalized in Stanford, remembering that I was a writer who dreamed about getting published someday kept me alive. Also, meds and my psychiatrist. Some people think that suicide is selfish, but the truth is most people who are suicidal aren’t capable of thinking outside themselves. They’re in too much pain. I’m in a better place in my life right now, I have things to do that get me out of bed in the morning. I love my dog, and I still hope that I’ll finish writing a book someday. And I know my life could be a lot worse. I have many things to be grateful for. I spent over fifty bucks on video games because of the Steam sale. I’m getting a 5.9% cost of living increase on my SSDI benefits in 2022. Which amounts to $60. So, I feel less guilty about subscribing to HBO Max until Mar ’22 only to watch Mare of Easttown. And Paramount+ Showtime combo so I can watch Dexter: New Blood. I have all kinds of firstworld carrot on a stick distractions. Streaming TV, video games, Audible audiobooks sale, all the freaking sales. I have 482 Audible audiobooks out of 685 titles that I haven’t even started. I’m also on Chirp audiobooks mailing list. Everyday I get an email listing their featured discounted books in my categories. FML. The only reason I have this much $$ to spare is because I live at home and my parents won’t take my money for rent or whatever. I pay for all the streaming services though and the dog grooming. My dad is addicted to K-dramas, while my mom is into Fox News, which is really quite depressing too. So, now I am listening to Adele songs. What is wrong with me???? See, this is the problem with my writing. I want it to be upbeat, funny, but measured. Sigh. I think the problem is my personal experience keeps getting in the way. I keep getting to the part of story where it gets hard because the subject is too close to me. I keep trying to write it from a different place or perspective. Maybe, from greater distance. Any character that resembles someone I personally know or any experience that is too similar to my own. I need to frame that character or event differently. Fictionalize it more. Give the character different traits or whatever. I don’t know if any of my ideas are good. But who else is gonna tell these stories? Anyway, so that’s where I’m at today. Lately, I’ve been playing video games to take my mind off things. Cozy Grove. Genshin Impact. Witcher Wild Hunt. ESO. Picked up Tales of Arise the other day. Thinking of doing another playthrough of Dragon Age Inquisition. But all that means is that I’m not writing. I’ve also gotta give up on writing for a specific audience. I gotta write what’s in me. What I need to write. But with good intention. You know, write from the heart. With the intention to make the world a better place. So, yeah, I put a lot of pressure on myself to do good and be a better person. Which is either pretentious or just stupid or fraudulent. Because I am not that good. I have so much anger in my heart for some people. And I really, really hate that I can’t just write already. Sigh. I haven’t had the energy this week, and it sucks. I am thinking too hard, and I wish I could write without overthinking everything. I wish I was little more ignorant because you know… bliss.

WIP Draft 2 Update : first 50 pages

So, I started over with my manuscript. I completed 50 pages @ 12,000 words in mid October, and decided it sucked. It wasn’t that bad. It was just kind of slow, and there wasn’t enough action. I kept getting stuck. I don’t like long and overly descriptive paragraphs. I like to get to the point as much as possible, but retain my phrasing. So, I’m saving a couple scenes and reworking them for the 2nd draft, which is faster paced.

But the themes of the manuscript are pretty heavy. I don’t know exactly how I’d market it. But I think it’s good, and it deserves to be read, whenever I finish it. LOL. It fits the formula for a romance novel. Happy ending, romance tropes, strong focus on the romantic couple. It’s the secondary plot that complicates the novel. So, it might be categorized as women’s fiction also. I really don’t know. I just know my characters are gonna fall in love and they will get a happy ending.

I’m writing the second draft much faster than the first, as well. The first draft took me about 7 weeks to complete the first 50 pages. In the second draft, I completed the first 50 pages @12,000 words in 15 days. Being this productive is encouraging. I think I might be able to finish this draft, around 80,000 words, in 4 months or so. November is NaNoWriMo month, but there is no way I am gonna finish a novel in 30 days. My knees hurt, my neck and shoulders hurt, I can’t sit at the computer for 8 hrs a day. I think a realistic goal for me is 500-1000 words a day. Some of my time is spent on research and just staring at the screen. LOL. And fixes of previous chapters for continuity.

Anyway, I really wish I didn’t have all these health issues. I am pretty obsessed with the novel writing and hardly have time to play video games. I am just too tired. I also don’t want to take time out to blog. LOL. But it’s also tiring as it takes time to keep in touch with people personally, hence the blog. I honestly, really, do not know why this is my life. It’s kind of depressing. But whatever. All the pain and emotional whatevers and all the crap I’ve been through in life are good source material for fiction. LMAO.

Poem: we say beauty is in the eye

we say beauty is in the eye
by Katinka

I want to go back
To a time when
I was young and beautiful
No, not beautiful
I would never say that
It’s too big a word
For someone like me
Beautiful is the word
For the desert
In an amateur photographer’s
Lens
Beautiful are the pelicans.
It was in the pictures
Where you told me
I was beautiful
Not in the wild
Not like the pelicans
I was not pretty either
I was fine (slang)
They used to like my body
They said
I was hot
They liked
My flat stomach
They liked
Me in a hoodie
Or in the club
I used to be a size 2
Can you believe it
What would I do
In a size 2 now
What is wrong
With me
That I can’t find it
In me to be
Beautiful like words
On a page

Here is a metaphor
(Without context)
In my eyes, you were the night

WIP1: Week 4 Progress Report

Well, it looks like I’m writing a romance novel for real. I got a book on Kindle called Romancing the Beat, which I’m using to structure my novel. It’s great. I need the structure, so I can see where I’m going and plan how I’ll get there. I highly recommend this book for aspiring romance novelists. I’ve got a basic outline, and I know how specific scenes are gonna look. I’m taking notes. I’m so serious about this. I can’t believe I’m doing this. I hope I stay healthy. I hope I finish this, and many more after. I absolutely intend to follow through with this novel, because I have ideas for other novels in my characters’ world.

I wish I could write faster, but I think it’s better to be consistent. To choose my words carefully. To get the tone and pacing right. To think things through. I shouldn’t rush, but have patience, be focused, and have a keen perspective of what I’m trying to accomplish. I’ve also been tracking my progress in a Word table. No spreadsheet, because I don’t have the patience for Excel. It’s not like I’m not doing hard calculations. I just want to keep track of where I’m at; my word count, page count, and weekly productivity. Week 4 progress: 6 chapters, 30 pages, 7300 words.

I got a little stuck in Week 3, Chapter 4. It took me all of that week to work it out. I was thinking I would write the whole novel from the female character’s POV. But I was getting bored, and needed to change it up. So, I tried writing it from the male character’s POV. It took a lot of trial and error to figure him out, but man, when I figured him out, I really figured him out. I freaking fell in love with him a little too. (I went with 3rd person limited, in case anyone’s wondering.)

I really love what I’m doing. I’m glad I quit WoW. If I were still playing WoW, I wouldn’t have the space in my head to think about my novel. I wouldn’t have the time to work on my writing, because if you’re serious about WoW, if you want to be really good at it, you have to dedicate so much time to gearing up your character. It’s pretty ridiculous. I miss tanking m+ dungeons, but I need a life. I need a future, a dream, and to follow that dream.

Writing is fun, but it’s work, too. Maybe, I won’t make money as a writer. But I hope to someday. I’m gonna try the best I can. I even bought a sitting/standing desk because I got so fed up with the pain in my knees, neck, and shoulders. I thought a new desk would help. It has, a little. My neck and shoulders don’t hurt as much, but the pain never goes away. I also write in two-hour blocks, which is pretty much my limit with everything. I have no idea if that last sentence was grammatically correct. I suck at grammar.

Anyway, time for a break from the computer…

Writing Fiction

Since quitting Wow, I’ve been able to work on my writing again. The past year, I’ve been brainstorming book ideas. I was thinking of revising the fantasy novel I wrote a while back, but it just seemed like I was beating a dead horse so to speak. I still love the characters and the subsequent short stories I wrote just for myself. But I think to write a fantasy novel well and persuasively, I need to have a larger imagination and vocabulary LOL. I would need to really work hard and commit to the world building, magic system, diverging and converging plot lines. I pretty much don’t want to write anything unless I can write it well (not including blogging, because I ramble a lot in my blog). And I don’t think I have the skills to pull off good fantasy. Maybe, when I’m older, I’ll have more time, passion, and patience to flesh out a full and rich fantasy world. But I kinda like what I’m writing now. Fiction. It’s my craft.

My other idea was to write a series of romance novels, centered on loosely linked, recurring characters. Each book would focus on one of those characters. The characters would all be Filipino American women dealing with differing mental health issues and secret pasts complicating their relationships with their families and love interests. Of course, these novels would be based on my personal experience, my lived experience, on what I know, but represented in fiction because writing a character going through all my various personal and health issues in my past and present would be too much. A character like me would be very difficult to write and probably to read. It would be a very long story. Whenever I start writing about my life, like a memoir, I quickly get bogged down, blocked, depressed. I might write one paragraph and then I ditch it, because it feels so overwhelming.

In fiction, I can be more inventive. I can have more distance and be more objective. I’m not writing about me, but a character who has a similar life experience, but not all of my life experiences. Most of all, she can have a happy ending with a dreamy guy, which is the funnest part of writing these stories. Yes, there will be sex scenes, depending on the characters’ personalities, and maybe sappy dialogue, some humor, some angst, but hopefully entertaining. I love the kind of romance novels that make your heart feel like bursting, that give you all the feels, that kind of story that breaks your heart and renews it. But I’m kind of limited in my vocabulary, and my thought process isn’t very linear. And I write really slow because I have a mental illness, I’m tired a lot, I have chronic pain, I have trouble sleeping. I also doubt the quality of my writing because I have a mental illness and can’t see outside myself most of the time.

I don’t know if I’ll ever get publish. I think it would be hard to market the kind of stories/novels I’m writing. But there’s always Kindle Unlimited LOL. Anyway, it’s too early to think about that. But it’s also good to have a dream and imagine what my future could look like. And it makes me happy. The kind of writing I’m doing now makes me happy. I feel like I have a very good reason to get up in the morning. I feel giddy when I imagine how my characters’ stories will end up. I’ve been outlining and jotting down notes and ideas. The novels won’t feel like real romance novels, because romance readers are very specific about how they want their stories to go. But the romance genre gives me the structure I need to craft these stories, hopefully, successfully. That is, I can use the romance novel formula to structure my narrative to make it easier to write and read.

Fiction writing is so much more rewarding and way better, funner, more exciting work than prepping for a raid in WoW and raiding in WoW. I can do this on my own time, I have no deadlines and obligations to work on a schedule (though I do have a tentative goal of 500 words a day, which really is not a lot. But when I get further into the novel, I think I’ll get into a flow. Some scenes will be easier to write.), and I can be around characters I adore. They can be anything I set my mind to. I just hope I can finish these books! Because they are books, not short stories. I have so much to say. After so many years of not writing well and not writing at all, I feel like I’ve found my voice again. This is the kind of fiction I was exploring in grad school. It’s MFA-style writing, I suppose. But more importantly, I believe these are the kinds of book I was meant to write, and this style of fiction is my true voice. I’m a little nervous putting this out there, because it would suck if I didn’t complete this projects. But I’ve done it before. I’ve written a novel. I wrote one for grad school, even though I thought it sucked.

I supposed my writing doesn’t have to be “good,” but it has to be interesting and readable. I personally think it’ll be kinda awesome. Because I am determined. I have nothing else to do with my life anyway. I just hope I don’t get stuck or I get discouraged or I’m having bipolar delusions of grandeur. I hope this is real, and I hope it is good.

My sad COVID vaccine story

So, here’s my COVID vaccine story (the complete story). I will not be getting the 2nd shot of the Pfizer vaccine because I had an allergic reaction to the 1st shot.

When I received the 1st shot of the Pfizer vaccine in late May, the right side of my face got swollen, and the swelling went away the next morning. Shortly thereafter, I got itchy hives on my stomach and chest area. I called my doctor’s office, because itchy hives and swelling were not on the list of common side effects. They spoke to my doctor, who said that she could call in a prescription for an antihistamine, or I could get Benadryl or an anti-itch cream OTC at the drugstore. So, I got the Benadryl, but since the hives came and went for the next couple days, I didn’t need to use it. My doctor’s office told me I could get the 2nd shot but that it was up to me, my decision…

This did not sound very reassuring, so I had even more anxiety about getting the 2nd shot. (My anxiety is so bad that I have been taking anti-anxiety meds (Ativan), despite the risk of addiction and prescribed by my psychiatrist, for 15 years now.) The hives and swelling didn’t seem that bad, and the common side-effects like sore arm and fatigue weren’t that bad either. I was anxious, because I had never had an allergic reaction to a vaccine or medication before, and I knew the 2nd shot could cause more severe reaction or side effects.

But I really wanted to get the 2nd shot and be fully vaccinated. I was very indecisive but I went ahead (my psychiatrist told me to suck it up) and scheduled an appointment in July at the pharmacy where I had gotten the 1st shot. At my appointment, the pharmacy tech asked me what side effects I had gotten from the 1st shot. When I told her about the facial swelling and itchy hives, she did not want to give me the 2nd shot. She advised me to talk to my doctor or get the shot at my doctor’s office, because they did not have nurses at the pharmacy. I called my doctor’s office who told me they didn’t have the shots at their office, which I expected, and to go to a hospital or clinic to get the shot.

So, I called the COVID hotline and the county public health office, who told me that they did have nurses at the public health clinic. But when I want to the walk-in public health clinic and told them why I had to get the 2nd shot there, they did not want to give me the shot either. I talked to a nurse/supervisor, who said they did not want to give me the shot because the 2nd shot could cause a more severe reaction like anaphylaxis. They told me to talk to my doctor. I called my doctor’s office, who told me they would ask my doctor and call me back. My doctor’s office called me back at the end of the week and told me that my doctor said I should not get the 2nd shot and I was not a candidate for the 2nd shot.

I don’t go out except for doctor’s appointments and my dog’s vet appointment or grooming appointments, and I always wear a mask when I go out. I seriously could go for weeks without even stepping out the front door. So, I think I am pretty low risk for getting COVID, but I still want to be fully vaccinated. It sucks and makes me sad that I had an allergic reaction to the 1st shot and cannot get the 2nd shot. My doctor did not say if I could get the J&J vaccine or what my other options were if any, but I guess I should be happy that I had at least been able to get the 1st shot.

Variants

So, I decided with all the new variants and the pandemic not going away real soon, I ought to get the 2nd dose anyway. My primary care doc said it was up to me. My psychiatrist told me to suck it up. He also told me I should take a break from WoW and I didn’t need to be around people like that…

But when I went to the pharmacy to get my 2nd shot, they asked me what side effects or reactions I had to the first shot. After I told them, they didn’t want to give me the 2nd shot because the 2nd shot is worse and I would have a worse reaction to it and they didn’t have nurses on site and other stuff. I assume medical stuff. They told me to get the shot at my doctor’s office. I called my doctor’s office, and they said I would have to go to a clinic or hospital because they don’t have the vaccine at their office.

So, now I am confused about whether or not I should take the 2nd shot as it seemed like the pharmacy thought I might have an even worse reaction requiring immediate medical attention or hospitalization??? WTF. I called the COVID vaccination hotline because I wanted to know what are the real guidelines because I am got different information from my doctor and the pharmacy. But they said they could not give me medical advice.

The CDC website said that if you had an immediate reaction (within 4 hours of taking the shot) you should not get the 2nd shot. But my doctor’s office said it was still okay, yet the pharmacy wouldn’t give it to me. There needs to be some clear guidelines because honestly the CDC has been all over the place!!! It is so frustrating.

The customer service rep at COVID vaccination hotline said there isn’t a maximum term limit to when I can get the 2nd shot. So, I can wait until I feel more confident, like when the FDA approves the Pfizer vaccine, which will most likely be early September. I am also looking into getting the 2nd shot at the county public health facility, which presumably has nursing staff at the site.

As far as WoW, I am done with WoW and all things Blizzard, until the lawsuit is resolved and their employees demands for a safe and fair workplaces are met. In the meantime, I am playing ESO (Elder Scrolls Online) and a little bit of Final Fantasy XIV. WoW is better with the technical/mechanical/combat aspects, but sucks at storytelling and worldbuilding in general. Leveling/questing is boring, linear, and the whole game is centered around getting to endgame/raiding as fast as possible.

Considering the current lawsuit revealing Blizzard’s toxic corporate culture & sexism in the workplace, it’s no wonder WoW lacks substance and heart. I prefer stories that make me feel like the authors really care about their characters. WoW just makes me feel empty. Unless you really, really like the players you play with, you’re not gonna feel good about the game. And it’s really hard to find people I’m compatible with in real life as it is.