I figured I haven’t been writing lately because I’ve been watching too much TV, specifically politics on MSNBC. I’ve been obsessed with the 2016 election cycle. It’s probably not all that good for my mental health, because the news can be depressing and can cause fear and anxiety, and I have enough anxiety in my life already. I take 3mg of Ativan a day because of my anxiety.
Yesterday, I saw my psychiatrist. I told him I was okay, but I haven’t been doing any writing. My mood though has been pretty stable, so we didn’t make any changes to my meds. I haven’t been badly depressed. I just feel like I don’t have a lot of motivation, inspiration, and energy to write. As always, my psychiatrist advised me to exercise or go walking. Taking walks has been a real struggle for me the past couple years. I hardly ever leave the house, and I’m very isolated and lonely.
I want to feel something. I want to feel passion and passionate about my book. I want to create again, but I don’t know where my imagination went. How can I write a book if I can’t even imagine it?